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I was miserable, angry, and felt so betrayed, but I was trying to hide it because I didn’t want to lose my friend. and after they broke up, him and I got close again, and we started dating.

I could tell she wasn’t thrilled, and our friendship became more about jealousy than anything else.

We had a lot of laughs, but Mel got serious on the way home—telling me I should marry Howard and move to California. Three months later, I Mel didn't remain a big part of our lives, but the laughs did. Spoiler alert: Life wasn't all laughs and the surprises weren't all happy.

As the years went by, the spaces between the laughs grew wider, replaced by differences and disagreements.

At first, we got in a huge fight and I thought we would never be friends again.

Then I missed her, we made up, and I tried to pretend I was okay with her dating him. Hearing her talk about him was torture for me, being with them together was even harder.

It has left me feeling stupid and embarrassed and I haven't got the heart to tell my other friends how this has left me feeling.

I showed up to meet him that night, and found a surprise waiting—Mel came along on our date.Eventually, our marriage ended after two kids and 13 years.By that point, our feelings had faded so much we functioned more like roommates than romantic partners.There are exceptions to every rule, but one girl code I’ve always lived by is this one: don’t date your friend’s ex.Don’t hook up with your friend’s ex, don’t talk about how you like your friend’s ex, don’t get into a relationship with your friend’s ex…. I’ll tell you a little story to explain why I feel this way.




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